A Greater Love Hath None
by NiefThing
Summary: A growing collection of Elricest oneshots. Will be updated as I see fit.
1. Chapter 1

A Fatherly Talk

Dislclaimer: Do I look like Arakawa-san? No? There you have it. I own nothing.

Summary: Ed and Al's father-figures bond and discover something that should have been left in the dark.

Rating: K+ for alcohol and very _very_ vague implications

Hohenheim had, admittedly, not been a very good father. Being absent for most of his childrens' lives certainly contributed to that judgment, but even before he had disappeared, any connections he could have been making with his children were often overshadowed by his angst, leaving his kids without the fatherly bond he could and should have been establishing. Of course, he realized that now, when his boys were grown up, or at least more grown than when he left them, and he had begun to make amends. He was slowly, _slowly_ easing himself back into his son's lives. An invite out for coffee on Monday, a 'chance' meet-up at the library on Thursday, having dinner with them on Friday; he was slowly making progress with his sons, especially Edward, who seemed to have inherited both his stubbornness and his penchant for angst.

Part of reinstating himself was getting to know the friends Ed and Al had met on their travels. Hohenheim went out of his way to meet the people his sons had helped. Every story of their escapades, from their overthrow of a corrupt preacher in Liore, to their meeting with the Xingese prince, to the adventure at Fort Briggs made his heart swell with pride for his sons. But in between the meetings, he discovered something shocking about himself.

He had been replaced.

It was shocking, the first time he met Ed's senior officer and saw an odd tenderness in his eyes when he looked at the boys, about two weeks after Al was restored. When Ed introduced him as 'The Bastard,' Hohenheim nearly choked on his tea. But the colonel merely laughed and introduced himself properly. The man was fascinating enough, but it was mesmerizing to watch the way he interacted with the boys. Edward was belligerent and insolent-just like he was to his own father- and Al treated him with quiet respect-just like he treated Hohemheim.

It came as almost a rude shock to find that, even in his absence, the boys had found someone to act as their guardian. It was odd knowing that this other man had been the one to watch his children in their most transformative years. Nevertheless, he was quite fond of the younger man, and grateful for his presence in his sons' lives, and they got along like a house on fire.

(He was to find the fire puns amused the colonel greatly, and took the opportunity to crack one whenever possible.)

And so it happened that he ran into Colonel Mustang on the way to the boy's shared house in Central, purchased by Edward as soon as Al was released from the hospital after his restoration. As it turned out, they had both been on the way to check on the boys, and they approached the house together. They knocked on the door in companionable silence and waited.

And waited.

And waited.

After about a minute of knocking to no avail, they began to be worried.

"Is Edward avoiding me again?" Mustang sighed.

Hohenheim quirked a smile, "While I wouldn't put I past him, Al wouldn't let him." That almost went without saying: now that Al was back in his own body, Edward was much better behaved, as if some great burden had been lifted from his mind and heart. Even if he were of

"Perhaps they just aren't home…" but the colonel trailed off when he saw the lights on in the kitchen window. No, someone was definitely home. But why were thy being ignored? Were the boys in trouble? They were both skilled enough that the idea of someone overpowering them was almost laughably unlikely.

But what were parents and not-quite-parents for if not to worry?

They exchanged a glance.

"I'll check the left. You go right."

Hohenheim nodded and stepped off the little path leading to the front door, walking around the right side of the house. The first windows he came to looked into the kitchen, and he briefly saw the colonel peering in from the other side, and unreadable look on his face.

The boys were not in the kitchen and the worried feeling in his gut increased tenfold. The rational part of his mind said that it was fine, they might be asleep or just ignoring them, but he couldn't shake the feeling that something was horribly wrong.

Looking through the next window-the window to the living room- he nearly fell over in shock.

Something was definitely wrong, just not quite in the way he thought.

His boys were sitting on the couch, perfectly unharmed, and they were kissing. It was _not_ a brotherly kiss. Deep, biting, passionate kisses that were absolutely anything but brotherly, and as he watched, he saw Edward pull back slowly, leaving Al gasping for air, and murmured something indistinct before crushing their mouths together once more.

It was odd. He was vaguely aware that he should be disgusted, but somehow, as he lurched away from the window and back towards the front door, he couldn't be less disgusted. At a deeper level, he isn't even surprised.

But any lack of surprise on his part does not keep him from meeting Mustang's eyes - when had the man reappeared? - with apprehension.

Mustang's eyes were grim, but equally unsurprised. Mouths set into hard lines, they came to a silent agreement.

After everything they went through, those boys deserved to be happy.

"Let us never speak of this again."

Hohenheim could only nod. They walked away, slowly, silently, until-

"Brandy?"

"I'm on duty."

"…"

"…"

"…"

"Hell yes I want that brandy."

 **Author's Note:** I really didn't mean for it to come across like I was shipping Hohenheim and Roy… but it sorta turned out that way. Wow. Five bucks says that's the weirdest implied pairing you've ever seen. Hope you enjoyed anyway!


	2. Chapter 2

Morning with the Elrics

Disclaimer: Would I have let the Shou Tucker thing happen if I owned Fullmetal Alchemist? No.

Summary: Ed doesn't want to go to work, and he's not planning on letting Al go either.

Rating: T for Ed's mouth and implications of **ahem** 'doing the do.'

It was peaceful, for once, in the Elric household. Two sleepy golden heads were snoring softly, blankets piled high, and the stillness of perfect contentment seemed to permeate everything. As dawn's pink fingers peered through the curtains and bathed the brothers in her glow, the younger gave a soft, snuffling sigh and buried his face further in his lover's chest, blocking the sun from his eyes. Mismatched arms-one of flesh, one of metal- tightened in response, and they settled back into pure comfort and utter bliss.

An alarm would have rung out and broken the silence, if the scheming older brother had not purposely deleted it the night before. Said brother snapped a golden eye open and looked over his lover's head to the digital clock on the bedside table, smirking to see the time. They were already running late. If he had his way, neither of them would get out of bed until…

Sleepy bronze eyes opened slowly to look into bright golden ones. A sleepy smile lit Edward's face as his little brother yawned. Alphonse was too adorable for his own good.

"Good morning, Niisan," he said softly. Sleepy lips curved into a smile and there was no choice but to kiss them.

"Good morning, baby," Edward whispered back. They didn't often use pet names, but here, blanketed by the softness of morning, with no-one around to judge them, there was no reason not to. "Go back to sleep."

Al blinked up at him, then snuggled closer to his chest. "What time is it?" he said sleepily, eyes already drooping closed.

"We have time," Ed promised. A quick glance at the clock proved that they most certainly did _not_ have time. They really should have been up fifteen minutes ago, but, hopefully, by the time Alphonse noticed, it would be far too late. He knew he should feel bad for his little white lie, but how bad was it, really? It was so nice to be here, safe and warm, with the love of his life tucked securely in his arms. No screaming, no crying, no annoying bosses yelling at their subordinates. Just the two of them bathed in morning stillness…

Stillness that was sweetly broken as Al pressed his sleep-warmed lips against his own. He opened his eyes in shock, but quickly closed them again as he recovered and began to kiss back, closemouthed and sweet. And then Al was shifting in his arms, guiding his warm hand down to his rear, and kissing him again. Fully awake now, the kisses were open and wet, and tongues were stroking and teeth were biting, and a gasp was torn from them both as Ed's hands _squeezed_. Already, he was aroused, the surprise of the onslaught and the morning wood combining to get him up even faster than he would normally (hey, youthful vigor combined with the sexiest partner he could ask for- could you blame him?). He rolled suddenly onto his back, pulling Al on top of him, all soft warmth and gentle passion, and shifted him into a sitting position over his hips. Al blinked, dazed by the shift in gravity until Edward squeezed his rear again, this time with only the metal hand as the warm one stroked teasingly along the clothed front. He gasped and bucked a little, making Ed hiss as the movement brought heated flesh into contact. Another bounce, this time with more directed force and Al's, head tipped back and he _moaned._ Very good…

Unable to be satisfied by just rubbing, he grabbed Al's head and pulled him down for another kiss, free hand releasing Al's rear to grope blindly for the nightstand. The limb flailed uselessly for a moment before he realized his fault: he couldn't reach. He nearly growled as he pushed up, shifting into a sitting position, metal arm firmly around his brother as they kept kissing. But Al's legs and weight and lips were distracting, and he reluctantly pulled away to lean for the nightstand again, pushing open the drawer that would hopefully contain the lube. On his lap, Al did the same, reaching for the nightstand on the other side, the one with the alarm clock, and the lube-

The alarm clock.

Oh no.

"Niisan, why-wha- aghh!" bronze eyes, previously darkened with love, returned to their original brightness as Al leapt off his lap and began to gather clothes for the day. "You _know_ I can't be late again!"

Someone with less of an ego might have the decency to feel at least a little bad for trying to pull such a trick, but Edward Elric was not that someone. "And why not?" he challenged lazily, not letting his disappointment show through. He'd been hoping to at least get a round in before Al noticed.

"Some of us have bosses that _care_ when we come in late," Al's attempt at a withering glare was compromised by his shirt, which was on backwards. He was forced to do a stupid sort of shimmy to get his arms into their proper places. Ed snickered. "And since the end of the quarter is coming up, he's been absolutely up my ass about being on time."

Ed murmured something along the lines of 'I could put something _else_ up your ass…' Exasperated, Al threw his hands up in a defeated gesture and stalked into the bathroom.

Reluctantly getting up from the bed, he followed his still-fuming little brother into the bathroom. Said little brother was brushing his teeth with far more force than was necessary, and did not even acknowledge Ed's presence, even when he wrapped his arms around Al from behind, being sure to exhale moistly on his neck, just the way he knew would make Al melt.

Under normal circumstances, Al would have become putty in his hands, exactly how Ed liked him. But, under normal circumstances, Al would not be so stubbornly annoyed with him, they would not be running late, and they most certainly would not be in the _bathroom_ of all places. Non-normal circumstances Al wrenched in his grasp, spitting out the toothpaste and giving him a warning look. "Niisan…"

Time to step up his game. "Mmm?" he said, languidly, brazenly rubbing his hips against Al's rear, hands wandering over Al's chest beneath the shirt. Al gave a quickly muffled gasp-perfect. Just a little bit more and…

Al punched him in the face.

Ten minutes later, a very disgruntled Edward with a rapidly forming black eye was standing at the front door, watching Al bustle around in the kitchen, and contentedly watching his cute rear as he did so. He was still upset about having been thwarted by Al's ever-present honesty, but his mood hardly ever interfered on a good perving opportunity. Besides, he had one more trick up his sleeve…

"Alright, Niisan! I'm ready to go!" Al sang, grabbing two bagels and his over coat and sauntering over to the door… only to find Edward blocking his path. "Niisan, I know you're mad at me, but we have to-"

Ed held up a hand in what could have been a placating gesture, if it weren't for the mischievous smirk, "I know, sweetheart, but…" he moved closer and wrapped his arms around Al's waist, too quickly for him to move away, "I still want a goodbye kiss."

Al valiantly tried to keep himself from blushing, and, when he failed, tried to mask it with a glare, "I think you've already gone over your kiss quota for the morning, _Edward._ " Usually, using Ed's real name meant Al was seriously mad, but there was something in his eyes and voice that said he didn't really mean it.

So Ed put on his best puppy eyes and cupped Al's head in his hands, "Please?"

"…Fine."

Ed smiled—a genuine smile—and pressed their lips together, mouths moving softly against each other, when Al didn't break the kiss and seemed to be leaning in towards him, he got bolder. He gently flicked his tongue against Al's lips, almost smirking as Al's mouth opened, allowing him to thrust his tongue into all that sweet warmth. He tilted his head slightly to deepen the kiss and heard Al whimper softly. His hands, which had been resting respectfully on Al's shoulders, began to move down, _down,_ until they reached the crest of that adorable rear, and then he _squeezed…_

And Al pulled away. He would have protested, but suddenly something was being shoved into his mouth, and Al, suddenly holding only one bagel, was dragging him out the door and into the car. Ed's sigh of defeat was muffled by the bagel in his mouth, and he sulkily started the car, backed out of their driveway, and drove away.

Somehow, even with Ed's ridiculously slow driving, they pulled up in front of Al's workplace just in time. Ed fixed his little brother with the most pathetic look he could muster, hoping to garner some pity, but Al just buttoned up his coat and reached for the door handle. But he turned back, making Ed's heart leap, and hugged his brother tightly, burying his nose into Ed's chest

"I'll make it up to you tonight," he murmured, voice muffled by Ed's shirt, "I promise. I love you." And, with a quick kiss to Ed's cheek, he was out of the car, moving quickly up the steps into the building and out of sight.

Grinning like a fool and blushing like an idiot, Ed pulled back out into traffic and headed towards HQ.

Perhaps the day wasn't _totally_ ruined.

 **Author's Note:** So… yeah. Not much to say with this one. Fluffy domestic Elrics are the weakness of my heart.


	3. Chapter 3

**Walking in a Dream**

Disclaimer: I still don't own it, buddy.

Summary: I must be dreaming.

Rating: K

I must be dreaming. Either that, or I have died suddenly, or perhaps an anvil has fallen from the sky and landed on my head, because there is _no possible way_ that what I'm seeing could be real.

I must be dreaming, because the people sitting in the chairs on either side of the aisle, all of them turning to smile at me, would never approve of this. I must be dreaming, because Roy Mustang is standing at the end of the aisle, wearing a ridiculous robe and an officiary's cap. I must be dreaming, because the sky is not that shade of blue, and there is no way that my favorite flowers are spread all over the aisle. I must be dreaming, because a love song is playing quietly in the background, someone must have started it when I walked in.

And I must be dreaming, because my brother, the Fullmetal Alchemist, Alchemist of the People, and the man I've been in love with since forever, is standing at the end of the aisle, dressed in the military blues he's finally grown into, smiling at me as though I am the most important thing in the world and making me feel like I'm the only one here.

I must be dreaming, because it feels like I'm floating down to aisle, my feet not even touching the ground. Because Brother is holding my hand and Mustang is saying something and Ed's lips are moving and I'm supposed to say something back but I think I left my voice behind. I'm choking around the words but I have to say them, I have to, because, dream or not, this is the most beautiful thing that's ever happened to me.

 _"_ _I do."_

And our lips touch softly and the bolt of electricity that runs through me restarts my heart, and I know I'm not dreaming.


End file.
